Wouldn’t it be wonderful if motherhood came with a fool-proof guide on how to do things absolutely right? I have three beautiful kids now, and I admit that the journey has been and continues to be a learning experience.
When I first became a mother, I learned so many things about myself, my babies, and my husband. But it didn’t stop there. I also had new lessons on time management, relationship management, priority-setting, and more.
If you’re a first-time mother, you should be able to relate to these ten truths I’ll be sharing. These truths will also make you feel understood, knowing that your struggles are completely natural.
Truths About Being a First-Time Mom
1. Motherhood isn’t always easy or enjoyable. There will be days when you’ll feel physically and emotionally drained, and it’s not uncommon for mothers to experience frustration, stress, and extreme exhaustion. This is especially common for first-time mothers who are still adjusting to their new situation.
2. There’s no one-size-fits-all approach to motherhood. You’ll be surprised to find out that you and your friends will have surprisingly different parenting styles. This is because every mother and child is unique, and what works for your family may not really work for another.
3. It’s normal to feel unsure. No one expects you to have everything all figured out from the get-go. It takes time to learn how to care for a newborn that’s completely dependent on you, so it’s important to be patient with yourself and seek out help when needed.
4. Guilt is a natural part of motherhood. You’ll often be plagued by feelings of guilt and inadequacy, and it’s usually because you’ll feel like you’ve fallen short, unable to do everything you think you should be doing, or feeling like you could have done things a lot better or differently.
5. Being a mother is not your entire identity. I’ve come across mothers who say that their entire identity is defined by being a mom. That’s an amazing thing. But motherhood is just one aspect of your life. It’s still important to find time for yourself, your interests, and your hobbies.
6. It’s okay to ask for help. Some strong moms think it’s a sign of weakness to seek out support and help from friends and family. Some even avoid seeking out professionals because they don’t feel comfortable voicing out their struggles.
7. Motherhood can often feel isolating. Don’t be surprised if you find it more and more challenging to find time to socialize and connect with your previous circle. But maintaining relationships is an important part of emotional health, so make an effort to do so.
8. Know when to prioritize your own self-care. Being the best mother you can be will require you to practice self-love. Take the steps necessary to nurture your physical, emotional, and mental well-being.
9. You don’t have to sacrifice your goals and aspirations. There’s nothing wrong with being a mother and pursuing your own dreams and passions. You owe it to yourself to make your life in this world as fulfilling as possible. It may require you to structure your days very intentionally, but it’s absolutely possible to have the best of both worlds—being your own person and being the mother that your child needs.
10. The expectations placed on mothers can be unrealistic. Don’t worry about being perfect. You can’t please everyone, so give yourself grace and patience when you don’t do everything right the first time. We all make mistakes and the responsibilities of motherhood are heavier than most roles.
Final Thoughts
From experience, I can say with confidence that moms can give their best to their kids when they also feel happy and purposeful. So, be patient with yourself, practice self-love, and reach out to others when you’re feeling stuck. We’re all learning as we go!